DPS can’t tank.


LFG has long been a endless source of material to moan and complain about – but I think I’m getting cleverer.

Inserting Witty comments and the like. Right before I leave group.

On my Healing priest –  I could see the tank was out of range because my raidframes had him out of range,  and here I see this hunter shooting at meathook.  So I heal him, and I’m  keeping him up,  and then he stops kiting, and feins,  so someone squishy starts taking damage,  and he’s a little harder to keep up,  and its all going ok untill like 20% and everyone starts dying.  That’s when they realise OMG the tank was afk and didn’t rescue them.

My Tank Brynhild is now level 30  ( and having a short break,  cause I kinda got excited and now have outleveled my leveling partner ) but I am educating the dps about not pulling in most of my runs.  It’s an important lesson to learn.

We let one die.  ( I was in cahoots with my healer) that was a bad one.  Like he had been asked, told,  Pleaded with, and he didn’t even try to bring it over.

I am somewhat patient.  They get a couple of mistakes,  but -” please don’t pull” is usually said at least once an instance.

The fun ones have been when they have gone off to other parts of the room,    ( eg 30 yards away in Gnomer) to pull, and then yell ” help”

It got so bad every time one run I was letting the healer drink  I was saying “Don’t pull”  incase they got trigger/dagger/random mage spell happy – that’s kinda funny.  The Tank having to tell them not to pull.

I asked why did you  pull

” Your too slow”

I replied “Healer had no mana”

” Oh”

I supposed if I am able to rely less on a healer.  EG  Keep a lot of Health pots on me,   I could go faster. I’ve gotten a few Oh Crap button cool downs now,  Last Stand,  Shield Wall  – so can survive a little easier.

I am finding with repetition comes a lot more confidence.  I found my Tank leading voice on my 5th or so run of Gnomer in a row.    “We are going to Jump,   aim for the middle of the Cog.”  and  now I have apparently outgrown Gnomer, so LFG has been sending me into Scarlet Monastary Graveyard.  Which is only a very short instance – I ran it four times in a row with basically the same group ( of course they were happy to requeue if the tank was)

There’s one thing that has been bothering me. I wonder if I should be displaying my Cloak? – you’ve heard of plummers crack?

This is Tauren Cow crack.

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5 Responses to “DPS can’t tank.”


  1. 1 Cassandri May 11, 2010 at 9:04 am

    ” Your too slow”

    Do you ever feel like replying

    “Not as slow as the Dungeon Finder queue for DPS?”

    And yes, please put on a cloak or a decent pair or pants or a belt or something!

  2. 2 Sephrenia May 11, 2010 at 9:41 am

    Young cows of today! Trousers always hanging round their hips….

  3. 3 Klepsacovic May 11, 2010 at 1:18 pm

    Just communicate with the priest. Have him/her drink very far back. That way if DPS pulls, the healer isn’t in combat. They can finish drinking and join the fight at their leisure. Possibly after the DPS have died.

  4. 4 Gronthe May 11, 2010 at 9:06 pm

    Maybe if you were a BElf I could stand the crack (in a weird way) but that is just disturbing. I’m rolling my first tank now, I can’t wait to let stupid DPS die – I’m sure it will be fun.

  5. 5 Worthintoon June 26, 2010 at 3:57 pm

    Ahhh, God bless google for letting me vent my anger at DPS by searching and finding this wonderful post. You are not alone, I hate DPS.

    Especially DPS in full heirlooms. Oh and especially plate wearing DPS that think they can tank, but don’t actually want to spec tank and make it official.

    God, I hate everyone.


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